Love in the Form of a Rebuke

One of the more difficult aspects of being a cell group leader based on my experience is in the area of correcting and rebuking the young men under me. The frequent questions that come to my mind whenever I sense that one of the guys need 'a talk' are: "Lord, is this you wanting to correct them?", "how do I rebuke in love?", and "how far does the spiritual spanking go?"

I'm still somewhat getting used to the truth that discipline is a part of loving someone, and being a single guy with no biological children pretty much lends itself to the challenge of learning how to dispense rebuke with a father's heart. But as a leader and a maturing Christian who continues to learn daily, I want to immerse myself in all the ways that I can grow. This area of rebuking the ones I love is definitely one I need to learn more of.

Being submitted to a cell group leader myself has taught me that receiving rebuke is part of the discipleship process. As I have several times been corrected by my leaders, I have not only become better in the areas where wrongs were set straight but I have also become wiser and more equipped to administer admonitions.

I have had the privilege of talking to some of the guys in the cell group to point out certain behaviors and attitudes that are not in alignment with God's word. Most of the time I approach this situation with fear and trembling. But whenever I ask the Holy Spirit to check the motives of my heart before taking time to rebuke someone, I get reminded that the Bible tells us to teach a child what is right so that he will not deviate from it later on (Proverbs 22:6), and that even God the Father disciplines us when we go wrong because He loves us (Proverbs 3:11-12).

When these words come alive in my heart, I begin to get the assurance that, like my Father in heaven, I am correcting one of my guys out of love, out of the desire to see them become better than they are now and become the men God made them to be. I believe that when I admonish them in accordance to God's word, I am doing what I see my Father do - showing love in every possible way, even if it means meting out reproof.

There is still a lot for me to learn about the whole "discipline-the-ones-you-love" aspect of leadership, but I find encouragement in Proverbs 27:5, which says, "Open rebuke is better than secret love." I hope you do too.

Discipline + Correction = Life

Proverbs 10:17
Pick your translation; the principle remains the same.


(New International Version)
He who heeds discipline shows the way to life, but whoever ignores correction leads others astray.


(New American Standard Bible)
He is on the path of life who heeds instruction, but he who ignores reproof goes astray.


(The Message)
The road to life is a disciplined life; ignore correction and you're lost for good.


(Amplified Bible)
He who heeds instruction and correction is [not only himself] in the way of life [but also] is a way of life for others. And he who neglects or refuses reproof [not only himself] goes astray [but also] causes to err and is a path toward ruin for others.


(New Living Translation)
People who accept discipline are on the pathway to life, but those who ignore correction will go astray.


(King James Version)
He is in the way of life that keepeth instruction: but he that refuseth reproof erreth.


(English Standard Version)
Whoever heeds instruction is on the path to life, but he who rejects reproof leads others astray.


(Contemporary English Version)
Accept correction, and you will find life; reject correction, and you will miss the road.


(New King James Version)
He who keeps instruction is in the way of life, but he who refuses correction goes astray.


(New Century Version)
Whoever accepts correction is on the way to life, but whoever ignores correction will lead others away from life.


(21st Century King James Version)
He that keepeth instruction is in the way of life, but he that refuseth reproof erreth.


(Darby Translation)
Keeping instruction is the path to life; but he that forsaketh reproof goeth astray.


(Holman Christian Standard Bible)
The one who follows instruction is on the path to life, but the one who rejects correction goes astray.


(New International Reader's Version)
Anyone who pays attention to his training is on his way to life. But anyone who refuses to be corrected leads others down the wrong path.

Your Hands for War

These are the nations the LORD left to test all those Israelites who had not experienced any of the wars in Canaan (he did this only to teach warfare to the descendants of the Israelites who had not had previous battle experience). Judges 3:1-2

Do not desire to be trained for spiritual warfare if you are not yet able to obey God in laying down your life and all the things you want in life to gain His desires and His plans for your life. The Lord's training for warfare is going to cost you your life -- nothing less. If you cannot follow Him that way, you cannot follow Him at all.

He is the One who trains. He is the One who teaches. If you do not yield to that, you will yield to something else. If you do not submit to the training and discipline of God, you will submit to something else. You are either for God... or for something else.

Who will you yield to? Who will you submit to? Who will you let train you? God? Or someone else?

God will train your hands for war, especially if you have not experienced it before. But you have to recognize that initially it is going to look unattractive, painful and uncomfortable. You're not going to like it at first, but in the end God's training -- the testings that come; the sacrifices required; the obediences demanded -- will strengthen your feeble knees, train your hands for battle and make you the warrior God has designed you to be.

But first be yielded to His will.

This war cannot be won with complacency and nonchalance. The devil has had us blinded for far too long already. Recognize that you are a soldier in God's army and you have a destiny that Satan wants to steal, kill and destroy -- both in the physical and the spiritual. The devil will stop at nothing to eliminate you -- you are a bane to his existence. He wants you dead. And if you cannot even learn to kill your flesh or even control your emotions, the devil will find it easy to toy around with you. If you won't even cry out to God for help, do not expect to put the enemy under your feet. Chances are the enemy will be doing tap dances on you.

God allows hardship into your life not to weaken you or to push you down, but because He wants to strengthen you by causing you to draw near to Him -- not run away from Him. That's how He trains you. Training for warfare is not easy. Understand that. Training is going to be tough. Why? Because the enemy is tough and he's been at it for much longer than you have been. But if in every painful and disappointing situation in your life you choose to run from God and cower in your own corner, how will you learn to fight this enemy of ours?

The Lord knows you are weak, that's why He has sent His Spirit to empower you. But you have got to make the choice to get with the program -- go all the way for God. That's how you win. Decide to follow Him no matter what the cost is, no matter what needs to be let go and laid down. Your present sufferings are called "light and momentary troubles" in the New Testament and compared to the glory yet to come, what we go through in this lifetime is nothing but a breath.

God will train your hands for war. He will equip you to not just survive the daily assaults from the enemy and from the world, but to be a victor at every turn. Just ask for Him to train you. Cry out to God to help you. Be yielded to His ways and then you'll see yourself becoming stronger in the strength of His might. You'll see yourself becoming the conqueror He sees and says you are!

Empty your hands! The Lord wants to train them for war!


"Praise be to the LORD my Rock, who trains my hands for war, my fingers for battle. He is my loving God and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer, my shield, in whom I take refuge, who subdues peoples under me. O LORD, what is man that you care for him, the son of man that you think of him?" Psalm 144:1-3

DGen Lesson: Discipline

Last Saturday the cell group discussed the topic of discipline using Herbews 12:7-12 as the springboard. The Lord gave me this word to share to the guys just hours before and I really believe it was a "now" word. I see in the spirit that many young men and women in this generation dislike discipline -- they don't even like the concept of the word.

Of course being the older man that I am now [33, thank you!] I am in a position to say that discipline that comes from parents most of the time brings good results to one's life. More importantly, my physical age also puts me in the vantage point of seeing the inevitability and infallibility of the discipline that comes from the Heavenly Father.

Lately, the Lord is seemingly placing me in the position of rebuker-corrector-reprimander of the young men in our church. Believe me, this is something I didn't ask for and if I could, I would give these duties to the likes of our drummer Caloy (who can really hammer in the truths of the Kingdom like no one's business) or our youth pastor Nap (who commands more respect).

But you know, God, in His infinite wisdom, chooses the foolish things of this world to shame the wise; He chooses the weak things of this world to shame the strong; and, apparently, He also uses the former non-confrontational, former laid back ones to dispense heavens proverbial rods on the rear ends of the semi-straying sheep. Yes! God does uses the foolish. Haha!

In the course of the discussion, we saw in the passage that no one is really excempt from discipline -- everyone receives it. More importantly though, we also saw that God's discipline is actually a form of love, because He is treating us as sons and daughters.

Below is the passage from Hebrews [12:7-12] with some of the revelations and ideas the Lord gave me:


Endure hardship as discipline;
-- discipline comes in many forms but is always accompanied by hardship, because the flesh is always resisting it

God is treating you as sons.
-- scripture says God disciplines those He loves. His correction is always motivated by compassion

For what son is not disciplined by his father?
-- this, to me, is a rhetorical question. I believe that fathers are "correctional" by nature

If you are not disciplined
-- no order comes into your life; no boundaries are set; chaos ensues

(and everyone undergoes discipline),
-- like I said above, no one is excempt

then you are illegitimate children and not true sons.
-- would a father care as much for an illegitimate child as much as he would his own flesh and blood?

Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us
-- and, as imperfect as they are, they have every right to rebuke us because they are reponsible and accountable for us

and we respected them for it.
-- if we have chosen to respond the right way. The quality of the life we live depends on the kind of choices we make. We can choose life or death; blessings or curses. Our response to discipline also determines how we grow and mature, how far we will reach in life and how fruitful we become in the spirit

How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live!
-- and we know that He never fails, never does anything that will harm us, and always wants to bless us. Instead of running away from God when He rebukes us, we need to humble ourselves and sumbit to His loving correction, because in Him we live and move and have our being

Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best;
-- and even if they weren't perfect persons, their intentions -- which include seeing their children raised to be upstanding citizens and teaching them to stand on their own feet -- are noble

but God disciplines us for our good,
-- which is why we should always ask for God's grace to respond to discipline the Jesus way: in humility, obedience and submission. Because in the long run, we are the beneficiaries of said correction

that we may share in his holiness.
-- and why shouldn't we? He's a holy God after all and He requires us to be holy as well. Discipline helps us get there

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful.
-- amen to that! But the trick is to see beyond the discomfort and the pain, and lift one's vision higher to the end result. We are more than now creatures; we were made for eternity, so having a forever mindset will set everything in perspective

Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace
-- and this is why it would be foolish to run away from hardship, challenges and testings: you'd miss out on the harvest; you'd miss out on your inheritance; you'd miss out the character development; you'd miss out ... A LOT!

for those who have been trained by it.
-- again, our response is crucial. If we see every trial and tribulation as a test of our fortitude, as an opportunity to grow and learn, and as a chance to see God move in our lives, our perspective towards discipline will totally be revolutionized

Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees.
-- the whole point of discipline is this! To strengthen us, never to weaken us.